A Friend in the Storm

I throughly enjoyed A Friend in the Storm by Cheryl Ricker. The book is filled with comforting words, quotes and scripture.

This lovely gift book starts out with hitting home at some of our lowest points, but offers hope. Cheryl Richter writes "Struck by dread and endless questions in the thick of instant night, tears and fears consume me empty, shred my grit to stick to the fight. 
Hands and lips uplift me briefly but they miss my bleeding core; Then the sound of Comfort whispers, 'I will show you something more..' "
Amazing words. I am sure we have all feel like we were at the bottom, our bleeding core needing the spiritual healing only our Maker can give. 

This book is amazing. It will be a great addition to my library, but I know that if I ever have a friend who is feeling broken and alone, I will definitely pass it along.

Finding peace

Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD "—and you forgave the guilt of my sin. Psalm 32:5

The end of this verse really sticks out to me, “you forgave the guilt of my sin.” I have always had a problem with guilt. I am the hardest on myself and have a really hard time forgiving myself, whether it is something big or small.

I searched the Bible; really hoping God would speak directly to me and show me how to accept his grace. I fully believe that by his grace I am forgiven, white as snow, but I linger on my own guilt. I want release, acceptance that I am not perfect, but because I have a living Lord, I am made new.

I have a really hard time shedding the old nature. I often do not act like I have been reborn because I carry the weight of my sin on my own shoulders.

I feel like David was writing my thoughts, my pain, and my feelings down. He completely felt like I felt and pleaded with the Lord to not forsake him. David knew that he was a sinner and needed the Lord’s help.

Psalm 38
My guilt has overwhelmed me 
       like a burden too heavy to bear.
 ⁵ My wounds fester and are loathsome 
       because of my sinful folly.
 ⁶ I am bowed down and brought very low; 
       all day long I go about mourning.
 ⁷ My back is filled with searing pain; 
       there is no health in my body.
 ⁸ I am feeble and utterly crushed; 
       I groan in anguish of heart.
 ⁹ All my longings lie open before you, O Lord; 
       my sighing is not hidden from you.
 ¹⁰ My heart pounds, my strength fails me; 
       even the light has gone from my eyes.
 ¹¹ My friends and companions avoid me because of my wounds; 
       my neighbors stay far away.
 ¹² Those who seek my life set their traps, 
       those who would harm me talk of my ruin; 
       all day long they plot deception.
 ¹³ I am like a deaf man, who cannot hear, 
       like a mute, who cannot open his mouth;
 ¹⁴ I have become like a man who does not hear, 
       whose mouth can offer no reply.
 ¹⁵ I wait for you, O LORD; 
       you will answer, O Lord my God.
 ¹⁶ For I said, "Do not let them gloat 
       or exalt themselves over me when my foot slips."
 ¹⁷ For I am about to fall, 
       and my pain is ever with me.
 ¹⁸ I confess my iniquity; 
       I am troubled by my sin.
 ¹⁹ Many are those who are my vigorous enemies; 
       those who hate me without reason are numerous.
 ²⁰ Those who repay my good with evil 
       slander me when I pursue what is good.
 ²¹ O LORD, do not forsake me; 
       be not far from me, O my God.
 ²² Come quickly to help me, 
       O Lord my Savior.

I am going to learn to no longer meditate on the guilt, but recite the hope and grace we are given in truth. If I continue to dwell in my old nature, to look to the negative and always not feel good enough, there is no way that I can show the reason for believing in a loving God. Not forgiving myself is disrespectful to the one who forgives me. I need to live the life I was given instead of being stuck into bonds I shackled myself with.

Psalm 130

 ¹ Out of the depths I cry to you, O LORD;

 ² O Lord, hear my voice. 
       Let your ears be attentive 
       to my cry for mercy.

 ³ If you, O LORD, kept a record of sins, 
       O Lord, who could stand?

 ⁴ But with you there is forgiveness; 
       therefore you are feared.

 ⁵ I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, 
       and in his word I put my hope.

 ⁶ My soul waits for the Lord 
       more than watchmen wait for the morning, 
       more than watchmen wait for the morning.

 ⁷ O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, 
       for with the LORD is unfailing love 
       and with him is full redemption.

 ⁸ He himself will redeem Israel 
       from all their sins.

Fun Sunday Craft

Yesterday I went to JoAnn Fabrics to buy fabric for an upcoming Quilt Retreat with my mom. On the way around the store I found a No-Sew Fleece Throw kit and it was super cute, plus 30% off! I decided it would be a fun craft for today.

I laid the fleece on the living room floor...wrong side together. Then began to cut about an inch apart, three inches down. 

Then I started tying. I pulled the blanket on the couch with me and watched TV while I tied. 

After about an hour I had a super cute new couch blanket! Just in time for the cool fall weather that has crept into Minnesota.

Ta-Da!

Who's in?

Last night I really had an epiphany that I want to make some huge changes in my life. I was to be proud of myself and I want to follow the path that was set ahead for me. I have some bad habits that often get to me into trouble or make me feel regret or guilt later.

I am not going to drink anymore. I am not a heavy drinker, but at times it has gotten me into situations that I should never have been in. I have learned a lot about myself in the last few years and I just think that staying away from situations is easier than being in them and being tempted. Plus, it saves a ton of money. Both my husband and I have decided that it is not really worth our time and effort.

I am going to watch my tongue. I have a tendency to gossip, it is so easy to pass on those tidbits of entertainment, but gossip so easily hurts someone. And, I am going to watch what I say when I get upset. I blurt out hurtful words and it can easily get back to me, as well as, upset the relationship with the person I said the words about.

I really want to stick out. I want people to know that I am a Christian. I want my faith and my relationship with our Maker to rule my life. I want the fruit of the Spirit to be so evident in my life that I am a walking testimony without saying a word.

I have always had a hard time not blending into the crowd and acting like those around me. But, today, I am going to stand out. I am going to speak up when someone is doing something that is out of control instead of sinking into the background.

I have also started praying daily that God will give me His heart. I want so badly to understand His love. I want to see people through his eyes instead of being judgmental. I want to see someone hurting and ache with them, help them anyway I can. I want to make a difference in my own communities. I want my life to be worth something. Sometimes I have to wonder why I was put on this earth, going to work and back home everyday feels so monotonous. I feel like I am destined for something better, I know I am.

Who’s in?

You were made to make a difference

I haven't even finished reading the whole book yet but I had to share it. You were made to make a difference was written by Max Lucado and his daughter Jenna Lucado Bishop. It is the teen version of Outlive your Life.
The witty style, the heartbreaking facts and the down to earth writing style really cuts down to your heart.

Did you know that there is enough food on the planet to offer every person 2,500 calories of sustenance a day? 

Why the heck are there people who have nothing to eat when I can shove a whole pizza down my throat. Wow, that hit me between the eyes.

Max poses three questions that were asked of him.
1. If you were a German Christian during World War II, would you have taken a stand against Hitler?
2. If you had lived in the south during the civil rights conflict, would you have taken a stand against racism?
3. When your grandchildren discover you lived during a day when 1.75 billion people were poor and 1 billion were hungry, how will they judge what you did to help?

It is easy to say "of course" to the first two, we weren't there, but we can saw that we would have stood up for what is right. But, question 3 is now. We have to answer to it. How are we going to?

I am so excited about this book. I am going to write an email to my church youth pastor and share this amazing book.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Rain down righteousnes

This verse stuck out to me. I think this is a lot like the roller coaster relationship I have with God. I call out when times are tough, I get close to Him, seek Him and thirst for Him. I become full of the Spirit, full of the knowledge and grace we are given and become complacent. I fall back on old ways and easily forget to read the bible or pray. 

It is time to see the Lord and He may rain down righteousness upon you!

All for one.

I am sure that if you have read my blog, even a few times, that something doesn’t seem right. I am writing less, changing what I write about and seem distant.

This is exactly how I have felt about my relationship with God for the last few months. I lost that closeness I felt when I started to really have complications at work. Instead of leaning on God, I started to draw away because my prayers weren’t being answered the way I wanted them to.

I have felt dejected, lost, stressed and helpless more in these last few months than I have in my whole life. I feel like I have no purpose and have often cried on my husband’s lap wondering how this has been the hand I was dealt.

Tonight I broke down. I prayed a prayer that has been in my soul since the beginning. I have always had such a struggle with grace, with faith. God does not need to care about my puny little problems. People have no job, are in poverty, and haven’t eaten in days. I have a loving husband, a house and a job that, for the moment, is paying well.

But, I am heartbroken. I don’t feel like I am worth of God’s will and I feel far from whatever path He has in store for me. Instead of calling out to our Maker, I cry into my pillow.

Tonight I prayed that God would help me understand grace, understand faith, understand His love. While reading Redeeming Love all I could think was how I was jealous that God was talking to Michael and Angel. 

They could hear his voice, even though it was hard for her to listen, she heard it.

Tonight I prayed that he would save me, he would show me his grace, show me how to have faith and quiet my life so I could hear him.

No matter how hard work is, how much I struggle knowing that this cannot be what I was put on this earth for, I know the most important thing is that I work on my relationship with God instead of pushing it aside because I am angry that my prayers have gone unanswered.

As I sat up from crying I heard two things, I needed to write and that I needed to read the book of Hosea.

Please pray for me. Not just that I find a new path, that life makes sense and I find God’s will, but pray that I understand the gift of grace and the reasons for faith.

Please share if you have anything, great or small, that is on your heart. I will pray for you and we will face this journey of faith together. We are the body of Christ and we need to act like it. All for one.

Redeeming Love

California’s gold country, 1850. A time when men sold their souls for a bag of gold and women sold their bodies for a place to sleep.  Angel expects nothing from men but betrayal. Sold into prostitution as a child, she survives by keeping her hatred alive. And what she hates most are the men who use her, leaving her empty and dead inside. Then she meets Michael Hosea. A man who seeks his Father’s heart in everything, Michael Hosea obeys God’s call to marry Angel and to love her unconditionally. Slowly, day by day, he defies Angel’s every bitter expectation until, despite her resistance her frozen heart begins to thaw. But with her unexpected softening come overwhelming feelings of unworthiness and fear. And so Angel runs. Back to the darkness, away from her husband’s pursuing love, terrified of the truth she can no longer deny: Her final healing must come from the One who loves her even more than Michael Hosea does…the One who will never let her go.  A life-changing story of God’s unconditional, redemptive, all-consuming love.

I really enjoyed this book. I prologue was really hard and awkward to get through, but necessary to read to fully understand Angel’s life. Angel was sold into prostitution at age 8 and went through hell. Michael comes out of nowhere and sees her on the street. The Lord speaks directly to Michael and tells him that Angel is the one he is supposed to marry. Angel and Michael are so different, but throughout the book the change each other and Michael teaches her about unconditional love.

The book is large, but a super easy read. It mimics the book of Hosea. I am going to have to read Hosea now and see how the story parallels.

Sunday reads

Hungry?? Try some spicy green beans @ Cooking with Wildtree

Missing the lake already? Check out some summer photos @ Missie's Shutter

Need a good laugh? Check out Brainless Tales

Need some good words? Visit The 160 Acre Wood 

Need something to keep your hands busy? Check out these projects from Blue Cricket Design

Pear-Apple Crisp

I have been doing some "stress baking" lately to deal with my crazy, soul-killing, stressful schedule. Glad to say, though, it does really help. Although, not sure if it is helping my husband's, co-workers or my own waistline. Hopefully, the chaos will soon die down so I don't have to worry about packing on the pounds.

But, for your own hearty enjoyment.

Pear-Apple Crisp

Ingredients:
4-6 apples or pears, sliced (I used four pears and two apples)
1/3 c. flour
1/2 c. brown sugar
1/4 c. butter ( or 1/4 Wildtree butter flavored grapeseed oil)
1 c. rolled oats
1/4 tsp. nutmeg
1 tsp. cinnamon


Slice the fruit and place in the bottom of a 8x8 cooking pan. Mix together all other ingredients in a bowl and spread over fruit. Bake at 350 degrees for 40-45 minutes. 

Caramel Apple Cupcakes

Amazing people, just amazing! I have a dishwasher and now baking is coming back into my life. Lol. We got a portable dishwasher from a friend and it is so amazing. So, so amazing! 

So tonights adventure....Caramel Apple Cupcakes! YUM YUM!

They are so sweet, just like the fall goody we have all come to know and love! Plus, so easy to make!

Caramel Apple Cupcakes

adapted from TLC

BATTER

1 package butter or yellow cake mix (I used butter) made with ingredient on the box

1/2 cup chopped dried apples

- Mix together, put into cupcake wrappers and bake according to directions on the box

FROSTING

3 TBS butter

1 cup packed light brown sugar

1/2 cup evaporated milk

1/8 tsp salt

3 3/4 cup powdered sugar

3/4 tsp vanilla

-Melt butter in 2-quart saucepan. Stir in brown sugar, evaporated milk and salt. Bring to a boil, stirring constantly. Remove from heat; cool to lukewarm. Add powdered sugar; beat until frosting is of spreading consistency. Add vanilla; beat until smooth.

Frost and enjoy! I topped with some ooey-gooey caramel sauce, but go crazy! Use apples, nuts, chocolate chips, whatever your heart desires!

Write with me!

After a few months of going back and forth and making excuses. I finally decided that I really want to try (ok complete) National Novel Writing Month again this November.

Last November I look on a children's story about a young girl who discovered a zombie and tried to hide the fact that he was a zombie and integrate him into her school. I made it about 20,000 words in and steadily gave up. I would write less and less every day and finally stopped mid way through the month.
I know it is a crazy thing to do, but it was really fun. I really wish that I completed the assignment last November. I really think that trying it once was a good experience and I really know what I am getting into.
So friends, who wants to join me?!

NaNoWriMo is all of November and the goal is to write a 50,000 word novel in a month. It equals out to about 1600 words a day. Pretty much, write whenever you can...on work breaks, while making dinner, instead of watching your normal sitcom, at the coffee shop or the library. Where ever you feel inspired!
I would love to have a little support group with all of you who are interested, we can get together on Twitter and encourage each other! Join me on NaNoWriMo!

You can take the next month and a half to research, get prepared, find others to join you and then start word one on November 1st.

Teen Mom

I have been watching Teen Mom while I cleaned the house today and there was one thing I noticed with all the young girls that had babies while they were in high school, their parents seem to be nowhere to be found. 

Almost every single one of the four young moms’ have huge issues with their parents.

That makes me stop and realize how much I had growing up. Yeah, I totally was not perfect at all, but I had parents who cared and were so overprotective sometimes I wanted to scream.

Catelynn’s mother calls her foul names, treats her horrible and was super upset that she chooses to give her daughter up for adoption. The mother constantly swears drinks and smokes. Catelynn just wanted her daughter to have a better life and not grow up in that drama. It is an emotional rollercoaster in her life.

Farrah’s mother actually got physically abusive and choked and hit her daughter, while Farrah’s 1 year old daughter was in the room. The show shows constant verbal abuse between the mother and daughter.

My parents gave us curfews; these girls had time to be away from their homes and sexually active with their boyfriends. I wouldn’t have even thought about that in high school. My boyfriend couldn’t even be in my bedroom.

I am so grateful that my mom knew where I was every day. She brought me to church and talked to me. At the time it sucked. Sometimes I felt left out from all my friends because I wasn’t at the parties and was seen as a “goody goody.” But, looking back, my mom was everything I think a mother should be and I definitely want to follow her example.

Parents, be there for your child. Talk to them; tell them the truth about life. Make sure you know where they are and let them know you can for them. And most importantly, be the person you want them to be. Let them follow by example.

Teen moms miss out on so much because they have responsibility much earlier than they should. If we talk to our teens, let them know that waiting is so worth it, even when they feel like they want to be intimate more than anything else; we can change the face of the next generation. 

Love Finds You book review

I really enjoyed “Love Find you, in Victory Heights Washington.” I was kinda surprised that I did. I am not typically into the romance novels, but this one was so jam packed with historical references that I really enjoyed it. I felt like I was transported back in time and really understood what it was like in the “Rosie the Riveter” era.

Here is a quick description of the story:

The Second World War has stolen Rosalie's fiancé from her. But rather than wallow, Rosalie throws herself into her work at the Boeing plant in Victory Heights, shooting rivets into the B-17 bombers that will destroy the enemy. A local reporter dubs her Seattle's Own Rosie the Riveter, and her story lends inspiration to women across the country. While Rosalie's strong arms can bear the weight of this new responsibility, her heart cannot handle the intense feelings that begin to surface for Kenny, the handsome reporter. Fear of a second heartbreak is a powerful opponent - but will it claim victory over love?

Although there were some small things I did not enjoy about the story, for the most part, the story of the whole came together well. At points I felt like the writing was mildly juvenile, but as an entirety the story followed a mature path.

I am definitely going to pick up a few more of the author, Tricia Goyer, stories. They are great easy reads that transport you to new worlds. So dive into the Love Find You series, particularly in Victory Heights!

Whirlwind Wednesday

I am alive! I promise! It has been a whole week since I posted, but it feel like just a couple days. The minutes and hours are passing so quickly. The only relief I have lately is sleep. Work is overwhelming. I am doing at least 50 hours a week, 10 to 11 hours a day. My house is a mess, I barely get to see my husband and haven’t seen friends in weeks. To top it all off…I have a horrible sore throat. Ugh. Can someone put the breaks on my life?

So, I find rest in the one place we can always find rest. Here is my verse for these past few weeks. Hopefully it will bring you comfort on this whirlwind Wednesday too.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28